Fashion Victim: my Absurdist Script

It took me a weeks worth of fail-inspiration and bloggers-block to remind me that I promised to post my absurdist play a long while ago. It’s a distopian planet where trends reign, but they aren’t trends as we know them. The fashion elite revel in blowing up their own houses and stealing bullets from the homeless. It’s a bit of a poke at fashion culture and how silly it can be at times. But you tell me what you think it is! Below is one of my favourite scenes, you can read the rest here on my Deviant Art page or even download it if you’d like.

Myself reading HONY

SCENE 2

The same vacant street. BRAZEN and HEARTH share a copy of Bizarre Magazine between them.

HEARTH                    Look at this. I told you! Even Vogue knows that bombs are back in!

BRAZEN                    What, seriously? Even helmets?

HEARTH                    Only rusted helmets. The bloodier the better.

BRAZEN                    Fuck, I threw away all my helmets last season after jabots came back. You can’t wear a jabot with a helmet. I should have known after Bizarre shot the heads off all their models last month!

HEARTH                    You should have. Atom bombs?

BRAZEN                    Nah, pipe bombs. Atom bombs haven’t been in since radiation facials and hazard signs.

HEARTH                    You mean when stripes were in? (Smiling.)

BRAZEN                    Stripes! Who wears stripes?

BRAZEN and HEARTH laugh manically. The sound of bullet fire rages on in the background. They pay no attention.

Enter the GIRL.

The GIRL wanders into the middle of the stage in front of BRAZEN and HEARTH. Blood is dripping from her wounded arm. She stares off, concentrating, frozen.  BRAZEN grabs her by the arm and spins her towards him. A look of pain is thrown across her face.

BRAZEN                    Woah! Where did you get that? (Excitedly.)

The GIRL slowly looks up towards him, wavering from side to side – pale and confused.

HEARTH                    Wh—

BRAZEN                    That bullet – it’s so hardcore. I want one!

HEARTH                    I’ll get one first!

BRAZEN                    It’s over there!

BRAZEN and HEARTH run off towards the increasing gunfire. The GIRL wavers back and forth, looking in circles around her, spinning. Suddenly she stops.

GIRL                          I remember—

The GIRL holds her hands to her head and lets out a piercing scream. The gunfire stops. She falls to her knees and topples onto the ground.

NARRATOR (V.O)   What did she remember? Was it that Barneys is having a seventy percent off safe on all buckets of blood? Luckily for the young-unfashionable there was, else she might never have been found by a few nurses looking for some discount designer bandages.

Please come back and tell me what you think! And if you have any ideas for future blog posts be sure to pester me with them – I’d appreciate both very much. Alternatively, are you guys writing anything?

Obituary Tag

Last night I was tagged in OddGhoulOut’s self created Obituary tag. I suggest you all go and check out her response because it was hilarious! You can see it here.

She states:

“I’ve been working in The Writing Studio at Georgia State today, when a worried student came in for some assistance. She was assigned to write an obituary for her Journalism class. This obituary was to be written about the professor of her course. I’d never heard of anyone assigning something like this (probably because it’s morbid), but it’s very practical to learn for Journalism. From there, I had an idea. I thought what a good tag/challenge it would be for fellow bloggers to write an obituary about themselves. (not to mention a bit of morbid fun)”

I agree completely about the morbid fun!

So, Here’s the rules:

1. Link back to whoever tagged you.
2. Put these rules in your tag. 
3. Write an obituary about yourself (it can be as funny or as serious as you like).
4. Write about a paragraph or two (or more if necessary) in length.
5. You may tag up to 10 people, and be sure to link to them.
6. Have fun, because creative writing is one of the greatest joys in life!

 Obituary:

Sarah Walrus wasn’t an incredible power of this city. Meaning that you may well be wondering why I think dedicating a space to this women is appropriate. To be honest it isn’t appropriate and in a week when this round of newspapers is thrown out she will be forgotten. Ms. Walrus passed away last Thursday evening, found DOA in her second home in Sydney’s inner West. The scene was not pretty, found with herds of her many cat’s feeding off the large gun-shot wound in the centre-front of her head. Sarah Walrus should not be remembered by her suicide, she should be remembered for her narcissism (that led to her completing a full face of cosmetics before suicide), her disdain for all of the human race (yes even all her friends) and her acute and constant paranoia that she could die at any moment (a bit late for that) that ruled her life. She will be missed and her books forever used as cheap firewood.

Her funeral will be held on August 31st. So, come and show respects. If not to show respects at least to join in on throwing an original piece her her writing (or artwork) into the fire of the crematorium.

Tag’s:

1. Dani
2. Amy
3. Natalie
4. Caitlin