Favourite Things of the Moment

In all honesty, during the last few weeks I feel like I’ve been doing nothing but spinning in emotional turmoil. I’m current in the middle of the last few weeks before I go back to university, so I’ve been looking for things to keep my mind busy before I get back to my regular schedule.

Leopard coat! I’m officially ready for winter.

Loud, Angry Music

When I’m not feeling my best screaming along to loud, angry music also always makes me feel a little better. My favourite song of this summer has to be Pretend that We’re Dead by L7. A close second is No You Don’t by Bratmobile.

Rookie Mag

While I’ve felt from the start that this magazine isn’t really written for myself as an audience (I feel so old reading it for some reason), it’s still great for inspiration, especially the picture. At first I felt a bit intimidated by Tavi’s success at such a young age, but I’ve decided that there isn’t a role model age limit!

Not Paying Too Much Attention to What I Wear

It’s been a long time since before I spent at least half an hour musing on what I wanted to wear during the day. It’s summer and I officially own nothing to adequately keep me cool. Most of my outfits consist of ripped shorts, t-shirts and thigh-highs with something thrown over my shoulders depending on how hot the day will be. While I’m happy to beat Coen at getting dressed in the morning, I can’t wait until winter coat and ‘having enough energy to use eyeliner’ weather hits.

Binge Watching Television Series’

People commonly talk about how their depression gets bad during winter, but my anxiety gets bad when I’m bored (usually during summer). To remedy this I always have a television series ready to be watched. My current favourite has been Game of Thrones, surprisingly since Coen had to tie me down to watch it in the first place.

What are you guys loving this sass-on? (I accidentally wrote sasson instead of season, but lets just roll with it!) Recommend me some TV shows!

Goths And Sex

Online, it’s not hard to see that there has been a war on sex in combination to Goth. There are those that believe that the connection of bondage with Goth’s is wrong and are hateful towards it, or those that still think that in such an apparently open-minded subculture they can dictate that if another chooses to dress in less that it’s for some reason wrong.

What Happened To The Mantra “Wear What You Want”

To put it bluntly, just because you dress in a Victorian style does not mean you can say that styles such as Deathrock are devaluing the subculture. Such a subculture that takes creativity and self-expression so seriously you’d think that there would be less close-minded bigots but that isn’t always the case. In a perfect world people would be able to wear what ever they want whether that’s a mini-skirt and crop-top or head to toe Victorian – you have absolutely no right (or even less right if you look back at this article that I wrote on judgement [here] – to tell another person the way they dress is somehow wrong.

BDSM And The Goth Subculture

 Lots of other bloggers have addressed the topic of Goths and it’s cousin the Bondage scene. It’s generally agreed that just because someone is a Goth doesn’t mean they are into bondage or are not into bondage. The reason someone is wearing a bondage collar isn’t necessarily because one is into bondage. It could be because of fashion, preference, bondage, a ‘pet’ lifestyle or any number of reasons. A lot of Goth’s like wearing elements of Bondage in their every day wear which can have a different meaning of being worn.

Some (not all) include:

  • Corsets
  • Fishnets
  • Plaid skirts (a symbol of school girl fantasy’s)
  • Collars
  • D and O rings
  • Leather, though this is greatly more accepted in the modern day.
  • PVC

Much like the Vampire subculture there is a lot of cross over with Goth and the Bondage subculture. This is generally because most alternative subcultures when beginning grouped together in clubs and events for a broader audience and to make money. Not to mention the similarities with generally dark clothing, open mindedness and loud music.

The myth that all Goth’s are into bondage goes very well with the myth that are Goth’s are easy discussed further bellow.

Goth Girls Are Easy

 As far as I have heard there’s no designated reason why the implication that Goth Girls are easy came from. To me it seems a combination of sexual symbols being worn by Goths, Goth’s in pornography and Goth’s (or what the media thinks they are) in television and literature. The myth may have developed from the rumoured open-mindedness to one’s own sexuality.

Goths And Pornography

Goth’s are almost fetishised in pornography to the point that it has become it’s own niche market. At one point even famous models sell pornography picture, such as (insert persons name here) that asked for objects on her Amazon wishlist for a return of herself pictured in it – it’s notable that most of the objects were lingerer. I’m not stating an opinion on this – as I believe it’s each to their own.

Other Notable Links

 Links Between BDSM and Goth by The Everyday Goth
 Goths Are Closed-minded by The Everyday Goth
MTV’s Gothic Sex a YouTube Video
Goths Make Better Lovers another YouTube Video

Goth Curiousity

I recently stumbled across Live Life, Laugh and Live Longer‘s blog during my exams and to be honest was to busy studying and was terrible tired and lazy. But today I finished my exam, though I still have some creative work due and when finally catching up on the blogs I follow noticed Stripy Tights and Dark Delights had completed it. And well, it reminded me. Now I don’t like posting things that other’s have recently posted but I’ll make this exception because while reading through Amy’s and The House Cats (that was in comment form) I was inspired upon my own answers.

  1. What does Goth culture and being a Goth means to you?

    Well, I haven’t mentioned this previously but I’m a bit of an elitist. I believe that Goth culture (for myself) is primarily about exploration of the music – Goth Rock but not just limited to it. It’s a bit about fashion and a bit about DIY but it’s also about making friends.

    I’m not saying people who don’t listen to Goth Rock can’t be Goth. I’m saying that for myself that’s how it is and that everyone has different exceptions and personalities. I know and love other Goths that would prefer cabaret and Celtic music to Goth Rock any day.

  2. People mostly believed that the Goth culture is into dark and death, etc. If you have a chance to shout something in their faces about the POSITIVE things that Goth culture had brought to you, what it is and why?

    Firstly, I’d like to say that I’m a terribly morbid person with terribly taste in dark humour. Even those that have me on Facebook can see this. I like to (most of the time) try and see this as a positive itself. Let’s face it. We’re going to die so why live to others standards? Just do what makes you happy – preferably if it isn’t hurting others.

    Other positive things include!
    – The ability to not care what people I don’t like or know think of me.
    – Awesome as hell friends.
    – It opened up my love of music.
    – A sense of community.

  3. What positive and good things does the Goth culture had brought to you that change you as a person?

    Pretty much as above.

  4. Why did you choose to be a Goth?

    I’ve stated this here on my blog before but I’ll sum it up here. It was a collection of people that came in and out of my life that opened me up to alternative living, one of these people being the wonderful Kitty Lovett that I met in high school.

    Funnily enough a lot of those things that people tend to just fall into have been a choice for me. I choice who I wanted to be friends with (mostly in an attempt to get away from the drug addicts – that are genuinely nice people – that were causing my demise) and I choice to get into the Goth subculture. Of course, by the fashion route – the music came eventually though.

    I literally chose to became part of what I thought the subculture was at that time because I was sick to death of living up to societal expectations. I forced myself to be friends with people I didn’t like at all. I talked about and forced myself to learn current pop music and culture but people always thought I was weird. I even spent a year attempting to get a tan because my skin just will not and I’ll be treating the results of it for the rest of my life. But I just didn’t care any more and decided that I wanted to try something different. I’d seen Goths around, loved it and then got into it.

  5. Does being a Goth is another way of self-expressionism?

    Yes, I think it is. Not only because of the artistic influences that this culture revolves around but because dressing in this fashion, listening to this music is a choice and is an expression. You’re expression your love for things you enjoy.

  6. My parents said: “Goths are cool. But, please stop playing funeral songs.” Do you agree in the first sentence?

    Well, yes. I believe Goths cool, generally. I’ve met (and even dated) some Goths that were and continue to be complete dick’s (sorry for my language), complete racists and/or sexists. But generally, I think Goths are pretty cool.

  7. My sister says: “Goths wears cross. But, they’re into dark things and such… Do they believe in God?” Do you?

    Actually yes, I do believe in god. I don’t want to get into it but my religious journey has been tough. But in a nutshell I was raised Catholic, went to church and continue to believe in God though not specifically Catholic values. There are times though when I don’t believe in god. Let’s, just, not get into that mess of a topic for me.

    And also, I think that being into dark things would make you think about (not necessarily in) god. Because in my opinion isn’t the afterlife one of life’s darkest things?

 Best wishes,
-Sary Walrus

P.S. You really have no idea how much I love questionnaires. They really get my brain thinking.

Labels – My Opinion

My opinion on labels may not be something you agree with but that’s okay because it’s an opinion. I’m not one of those people who are anti-label because apparently it takes away from your individuality. I’m sorry but I think that is completely ridiculous. At the same time I’m not someone who thinks that a label means nothing, I just don’t think that referring to yourself as something, for example a Goth, defines you as much as people assume.

As humans we label things. Labels make objects, people, hobbies easier to understand. If we’re speaking in general terms every noun is a label. We label places because it makes sense to, it would be difficult or impossible to not use nouns to describe the directions to a place. We use labels as an easy way to quickly find people we might like, to get to destinations and to communicate with other people.

Labelling people can be just as useful as places, it’s not always accurate and it doesn’t always have to be completely accurate. We label people as boys, girls, none or both. We label republicans and liberals. African-Americans, Australians and Germans. As such I think people put too much angst into labels because in the end it’s your who choose your own labels.

Labelling doesn’t limit you. When I hear someone say I don’t like to label myself as if that’s the reason, it kind of annoys me. The real thing I want to know is WHY you don’t like to label yourself. If you don’t want to define yourself that’s fine. I think it’s a bit condescending but fine. The thing about labels is that you can pick and choose. As people we try to find ourselves and that includes picking and choosing labels such as girly, tom-boy, geek, Doctor Who fan and cosplayer. When someone says that they don’t want to define themselves with a label it makes it look as if the label is a prison.

Following along with that just because you are, say a geek, doesn’t mean you can’t combine labels and like only Geek things. You don’t mould to the label, the label moulds to you. Labels are interchangeable, and while I’ve written up this entire rant-thing that probably has it’s own hypocrisy in it labels aren’t the end of the world.

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I don’t understand why people get so angry when people choose to refer to themselves as something that they are. I don’t get angry when people tell me that they don’t want to label themselves because that’s your choice and effects me in no way. We all have our own reasons.

In the end I think labels are here for one main reason, something that humans do naturally, and that is to build communities. As social creatures (some more than others) we seek out others like ourselves and labels make that easier. Who in the end, wants to be with people they don’t like.

Feel free to leave your own opinion and argue mine but please don’t be rude. I try to keep my opinion to myself on this blog because I know a lot of my followers are very individual in their beliefs but I’ll be happy to try and see your point. :3

Poll Of The Week: Do you refer to yourself as a Goth?

We’re all heard the story that real Goth’s don’t call themselves Goths. Then there are the people that don’t like to fall under a label. You’ll soon hear my opinion on these things but first I want to hear yours. So go to the poll on the right side of the screen at the top of the side bar and cast your vote. Don’t forget to leave a comment and tell me what you think on the matter.

  • Yes, I am a Goth and refer to myself as a Goth.
  • No, I am a Goth (within the context or something much the same) but choose not to refer to myself as a Goth.
  • I am not a Goth. (Leave your opinion on what you do think!)

Best wishes,
One more step to Friday, I’m in love! (Is this just too cheesy?)
SaryWalrus

Panda Poppare: A Subculture You’ve Probably Never Heard Of.

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Panda Poppare (Panda Popular or just Panda) is a Swedish youth subculture that relies on inspiration from Brit-pop and pop art. They can also be found under the name of BDpoppare which is based on one of the most popular bands of the subculture: Broder Daniel. They’re much like a modified Mod, taking fashion inspiration heavily from this style. At first I thought there wasn’t much information about Pandas at all but that was because my searches are primarily of English sites. It was merely coincidence that I stumbled upon it on the Tumblr, Fuck Yeah Urban Tribes but I’m glad I did!

Fashion:

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  • Peter Pan collars on dresses and blouses.
  • Mod clothing including: a-line mini-skirts, shift dresses and much much more.
  • Main colours consist of red, black and white.
  • Stars drawn under the eyes.
  • A teased jaw-lined, bob.
  • Lots of colourful wrist bands.
  • There seems to be a theme of black and white stripes. 
  • BD (Broder Daniel) insignia on t-shirts, pins, anything.

What do you think of this youth fashion? Have you had experiences with them before? Tell me in the comments below!

Best wishes,
-Sary Walrus

Dating Outside of the Subculture: Things to Consider and Disregard

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This is in response of the Poll of the Week about dating outside of the subculture that can be found on the right side bar at the top.

Now, I’m not going to try and tell you whether you should or shouldn’t date inside or outside of the subculture but I can say that the poll suggested what I already though; most of you are pretty open minded. Then again it all depends on the situation and that is what I’m going to be discussing.

Firstly, I have the most un-Goth boy friend almost possible but he’s also a hardcore gamer. Something I see often is the cross over between the gaming community and alternative subcultures/etc. It could be the possibility that they both are somewhat secluded from ‘normal’ society but I don’t particularly want to lump all Goth’s and all Gamers into that category. Some of the gamers I know are the most social and popular people but then that also ties into the fact that gaming is becoming popular culture these days which I’m not going to get into because that’s beside the point.

Then again I have also dated a Goth, only one (hehe). Sorry to say he wasn’t a very good representative of the scene and this was while I was still a baby-bat: racist, hateful and violent. Such a lovely mix. Though I don’t have very good experiences in dating within the subculture I’ll try and stay as fair as I can. I remember the little things like the proud moment he let me take home his assortment of spiky brackets and chains. But to be perfectly honest, I prefer to date outside of the scene.

While we have my little rant out of the way let’s go onto the pros of dating within and outside of the subculture. There will be no cons!

Pros for dating within:

      • You have a general idea that they would be interested in thing’s somewhat parallel to your own.
      • They may have a better understanding of your subculture, why you are involved in your subculture and general stereotypes.
      • They probably wont feel embarrassed by your clothing choices or simple things you say or like in public and if he does then it’s probably not the best.
      • You can dress up together! This is a very shallow pro though and depends really on the person.
      •  Non-Goths could take you as some sort of stereotype, for instance you’re into really kinky things etc.
      • Goth jokes can be openly spoken and understood.
      • There isn’t really a chance of dating them and finding out that you’re their toy of rebellion.
      • You can both actively be involved in the scene.
      • Non-Goths may be intimidated when surrounded by your Goth friends. (This was Coen’s con.)
      • Meeting the parents could go a lot smoother as they could already be used to the look.
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Pros for dating outside of the subculture:

    • They may have similar interests as you.
    • They may be very open minded.
    • You could gain insight into a different subculture. (I know so much more about the gaming scene now.)
    • There’s no pressure to be ‘more Goth’ to compete with your significant other or to live up to their standards.
    • There’s always the saying: opposites attract. Which is completely true for me.
    • Most people say that you need a life out of your similar interests. Dating someone from a different subculture could be this non-similar interest.
    • Freedom to be yourself without loss of Goth Cred (Which only exists in your emotions).

 Now that you have the pros and pros the next step is to completely disregard all of them. Sure these are things that subconsiously come into relationships and sometimes tear them apart but don’t live your life on rules. Everyone is different; there is no rule that can’t be dis-proven by someone. So go with your gut and if you love someone it shouldn’t matter whether they’re Goth or not. If you want to date either way or not date at all is your own choice. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Best Wishes,
-Sary

The Infamous Goth Debate.

This is in response to this weeks Poll of the Week about the infamous Goth debate.

There are of course varying opinion’s on what makes one a Goth. It’s generally accepted that you at least have knowledge of the music, fashion and perspective and the lifestyle in general. Then there are those that believe the music is most important and other’s that battle for the fashion side of the argument. And then there are those that argue they were born Goth (or grew into it) and the music/fashion was just a bonus. It’s a opinionated concept though as there are no definitive rules; there is no “You are a Goth if you [insert list of Gothiness].

Source

Music:
Some say that Goth music must be a defining attribute or at least knowledge of the music. The Goth Subculture is said to have risen up around the eighties Goth music Movement. A general belief by some is that anyone can pull on some black clothes but enjoying the music and researching the music and the way it takes you through time to truly appreciate Goth as is today truly makes you as a part of the subculture.

Fashion:
Then there is the fashion argument. Fashion is the defining piece that gives others a glimpse into your interests, however shallow that glimpse is. The fashion is what let’s other Goth’s give you that Goth nod as they walk past. The fashion is just as in depth as the music. It isn’t just ‘pulling on some black clothes’ but designing and maintaining elements of Goth fashion in everyday life. It takes time and effort (not to mention money) to build a Goth wardrobe. A general belief by some is that lots of people listen to Goth music but that doesn’t mean they all are Goths.

Perspective/Life Style:
Perspective I thought was summed up perfectly by a commenter, specifically Lady Euphoria Deathwatch. It made me quite happy to read and I think you’ll all enjoy it too. I hope she doesn’t mind me posting this!

“As a pre-Goth movement Goth, I know that for me the music is secondary. I was a Goth before there was punk. I hung out in cemeteries and wore black. I painted my lips black with eye liner because there was no black lipstick back them. I watched dark movies, read dark books, listened to dark music. I wore Victorian mourning dress only at home or run the risk of being killed for my odd differences. I was there in the beginning of the Goth movement and laughed myself silly as kids of the day tried to make it their own. I was born Goth. It has always been my way of thinking. You can take away the trappings, music and fashion and I’m still a life long Goth to this day.  No amount of trying to change me has moved my thinking in all these years. I am Goth heart and soul. More power to the Goths that found their way here through the music or fashion. But they stayed because it was something in the way that they think.”

A Side Note:
On a side note; if you haven’t already noticed the great Goths In Hot Weather has started posting again (only slightly but it’s still success!). So if you haven’t already checked the blog out I demand that you do here.

Best Wishes,
-Sary

Skinheads: My Truth, Their Misconceptions

This is an article that I’ve been meaning to write for a while. I absolutely adore Skinhead fashion but there are a lot of myth’s about the Subculture that I find ridiculous that I will address.

Aren’t Skinhead’s merely someone who shaves their head?

It really annoys me when someone says this as it isn’t at all true. Skinheads are members or the Skinhead Subculture. A subculture that has a broad history, it’s own musical influences and styles, fashion and fashion influences and enjoy aspects of the skinhead lifestyle. These aspects will be briefly explained below.


I always thought Skinhead’s were racist?

Originally the Skinhead subculture was actually influences mainly by Jamaican Rude boys and held no common trait of racism at all. In the late 1960’s some Skinheads begun engaging in violence against immigrants, this became the way some Skinhead’s align themselves and group themselves. Yet, Skinheads are still people. Everyone of them have varying opinions and to lump all members of the subculture together with a section that brought this bad name for all Skinheads to be racist is ridiculous.

What about gay/lesbian/bi people, don’t they hate them?

This is along the same lines as my response to racism stereotypes. It’s explained greatly in this documentary called Skinhead OUT! which you can watch both part one and part two on youtube. There is no one mindset that applies to all of the Skinhead community. I must say again: they are people, each with their own opinions, morals and ideals.

Why are all Skinhead’s pale in demeanour?

Not all Skinhead’s are Caucasian, there were and still are coloured skinheads. This is another stereotype that runs along the lines of all skinheads are racists.

A Brief History

It all started in the late 1950’s when the United Kingdoms economy boom meant some had extra money in their pockets. This developed the mods whom were known by their devotion to scooters, music, fashion and consumerism. Those mods of a lesser income of the working class went for a practical style including work boots, straight legged jeans, buttoned down shirts and braces. After controversy between the smooth mods (The more expensive mod) and the hard mods (working class) which around 1968 became more commonly called Skinheads. Skinhead’s kept some of the mod influences with an emphasis on Jamaican Rude Boy style and culture.

Skinhead Music

The Skinhead Subculture was originally associated with soul, reggae, rock-steady and ska but once those genre’s started directing themselves towards black nationalism themes, which most white skinhead’s couldn’t relate too, the music was transformed. In the 1970’s 2Tone was one of the most popular genre’s of the Skinhead Subculture which included the Jamaican influences combined with Punk Rock. After the first wave of punk rock some Skinhead’s embraced Oi!, Punk’s working class sub-genre, which combined football chants, punk rock and glam rock.

Why do Skinhead’s shave their head’s?

Traditional skinhead’s commonly shaved their head’s as they were workers and it was more suitable or practical. Another reason would be in defiance of the hippie culture for some. There’s also, of course, they may merely have liked the style.

Skinhead’s all look the same!


Just in case you didn’t sense my sarcasm, sarcasm intended. Of course Skinhead fashion is typically branded by their shaved heads, but not always, the styles have changed quite a bit through the years. It’s much easier to separate them into sections, though of course this doesn’t at all limit the variation.

Trojan Skinheads (Traditional Skinheads)
These, of course, follow the typical style of the 1960’s with braces, flight jackets, button down shirts, polo shirts, cardigans, denim jackets, v-necks, straight legged jeans, work boots and such, with head shaved at a #2 or #3 grade clip guard (The same as my undercut).

Oi! Skinheads
 Oi! Skinheads are influenced by 1970’s Punk, often with shorter hair (typically #2 grade or shorter), higher boots, tighter jeans and tattoo’s. Mods were much less influential than traditional Skinheads.

Hardcore Skinheads
This style is much less strict including leather/army jackets, wife beaters, looser jeans (sometimes torn), hoodies, bandanna’s and chain belts. Hair was short, sometimes even shaved with no guard or a razor.

White Power Skinhead (Neo-Nazi Skinhead)
Army pants, T-shirts, higher boots and shave their heads are either grade #0 or with a razor. They wear badges, chains and rings, also common are tattoos, featuring white power slogans or Nazi symbols. 

For more information on the Skinhead Subculture you may want to check out this documentary on you-tube called Skinhead Attitude that was made in 2003. Skinheads are also represented in popular movie This Is England.

**I claim no photography in this article as mine.**

Intimidation In ‘MY’ Goth Scene.

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Obviously, I personally identify with the Goth Subculture, or maybe not so obviously. I try my hardest to work with my limitations: Budget, availability and such, to maintain a pretty, aesthetically pleasing, detailed outfit. Some day’s those goals feel as if they were crushed to the ground by perfectly nice people that meant no harm. As somewhat of a Baby-bat in the scene (somewhat because I’ve been a part of it for four years though I don’t think I’ve progressed enough to my liking) I often see the amazing outfit of an older member and suddenly what I was wearing seemed to be as good as fully pastel in comparison. To sum it up; they intimidate me.

This post stemmed from the fact that I saw six Goth’s today, all of which looked amazing. Each of which stunted my confidence that much more. Now to get to the point I have this feeling of intimidation and inferiority but I know that I shouldn’t. The scene is about being your self and (The fashion aspect of course but in some ways the music also) dressing in a manner that you enjoy. Mine just happens to be platform boots, frills and stripes, oh and we can’t forget dots.

So here are just some points for every fellow (somewhat) baby-bat to remember:

  • Just be yourself. Does it matter that you fit the mold and look just as Goth as everyone else? No. What is important is being happy with who you are, personally.
  • Just because someone looks at you doesn’t mean they are judging you. Today one of the Goth’s was staring intensively at me and looked at the verge of walking over. He either wanted to tell me how much of a poseur I was or say something nice by the looks of it, but what matters it that it could have been either. When such a thing happens it is not your own fault, you are not doing anything wrong (Most of the time). In my opinion it depends on the personality of the speaker. Some people are just assholes, inside and outside of the subculture.
  • Intimidation isn’t always a bad thing (In my opinion), neither is criticism, it can be helpful and a little intimidation (verging on inspiration) may be that little push you need towards something you will love. For instance being called a poseur may make you wonder why, you may proceed in looking up why that happened and discovering ‘Goth music’ for the first time.
  • Certain stereotypes aren’t ‘rules’ to how you should look, maybe inspiration but not rules. Sure a lot of people in the scene have black hair but you can be a Goth and have natural coloured hair. If you prefer Maryjane’s to platform boots, that doesn’t make you any less Goth. This leads me to my final point.
  • Goth is what you make it. Expressing yourself in your own way is the beautiful thing about the subculture. Throughout society we are told what to wear to fit our ‘stereotype’. Trendy people must wear what is in fashion, men must not wear skirts. If the Goth Subculture told you, you MUST wear platform boots, have black hair and wear trench coats how does that make us any different than mainstream society? Moral of this rant: wear what you like to wear because if I told you you were wrong, you might as well say the same straight back to me.
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The aim behind this post was to make myself feel better for being my unique self. It also helped me realise that of the six Goth’s I saw today, none in any one way resembled each other in their style, apart from the basic elements of black.

That’s all I can muster today, as I spent around ten hours on a train, all up.
-Sary.